Reflections of a Wife, Mom & Weightloss Surgery Patient!

What you do and don't do to manage your life does not only affect you. It affects everyone around you!- Author Elizabeth George

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Negative Calorie List

I mentioned the other day I have been going to the fruit market more recently for get more fruits & veggies to keep in the house.

I found this list and that it was totally cool that my feeling of doing something right balances with the actuality of doing something right!!


Can you believe that there are really foods out there that are readily available, taste good and things you may already eat that causes your body to burn more calories to consume them than the item itself!!

I am not sure about you, but that totally excites me!!

I came across this food list on a website I check when I need more information on listing the correct amount of calories/ fat grams/ carbohydrate grams/sugar grams etc, etc. Calories-in-Foods has an interesting article about a new trend called the "Negative Calories in Food" Diet. I had never heart about this before, so I read the article. I liked the list because it is alot of food I already use as a part of a healthy diet but it was nice to see because then I could use the list to pair up with food that may be a little higher in fat and calories than I may like.

For example, I had a chicken salad sandwich for lunch. The chicken is packed with protein, and the bread is whole grain that is a good source of fiber. It is the mayo that is what did this normally healthy lunch in. So, I used my list to pair my sandwich with a slice of tomato and some watermelon. Did this totally make up for the mayo? Not entirely, but it helped to bring the nutrition levels down to something I was a little closer to being comfortable with.

The article explains, "What negative calorie foods are believed to be are in actual fact are foods that if consumed into the body either raw, or in a few instances cooked only slightly on their own with nothing added to them, will use more calories to process and digest than the amount that they contain. There are many foods that are known as metabolism boosting foods and these are foods that will burn calories when they are consumed because the body is forced to work that extra little bit hard to process, digest and actually extract the calories from them. In the case of negative calorie foods the concept is the same but these are already very low calorie so the number required for the body to burn will turn the total into a negative figure, pretty amazing huh?
Foods that have am overall negative calorie value generally contain vitamins and minerals that will produce enzymes that are able to break down the food's own calories and also further calories from the body in digestion too. This useful effect is referred to as 'the negative calorie effect'."

This list is not enough for me to make me go off the deep end and start only eating these foods! But, I can tell you from the time I posted it on the fridge and now, I have choose fruit as opposed to popcorn for a late night snack. So, its helps!

Most, if not all, of the foods on this list are considered complex carbohydrates too. I pair them with lean meats, as a part of my gastric-bypass diet or a high protein/low carbohydrate diet. It is next to impossible and disastrously unhealthy for you to remove all foods from your diet that have "carbohydrate" in the title. It is more productive to replace, starchy or empty carbs with complex ones. The complex carbs do double, sometimes triple duty, in fueling your body with adequate nutrition.

Always remember that you should "boost" your metabolism every third day or so with a starchy carb, like a potato or brown rice, because these items are healthy for you and offer your body energy and various vitamins. It is the empty carbs: like chips, candy and cakes that typically offer to much sugar into your diet and should be used sparingly.

I NEVER want to feel like I am missing out on the "fun" food to loose some weight and make my family healthier. So I found this blog:The green backs gal. She has this amazing recipe called the Carrot Cake Oat Stacks. They look amazing and since they are glutten free and sugar free, I will definitely being trying them!! I think I will bake some up for Korbin as a breakfast cookie, since I am always on the hunt for something that is good for him and quick to eat. I may also change out the banana and use some chunky apple sauce instead.

Oh! And of course omit the nuts!

If you try them, be sure to let me know what you think!!

~Kristy ~

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Drum Role Pluh-Eeze!!

The scale this morning read 253.6, which is down(2.6lbs) from 256.2 that it read on 5/18. For the month of May, I have lost a total of 6.1 pounds!! Even with my stress eatting disaster!!

I am munching on some watermelon and blueberry's as a mid morning snack, and I have had my favorite premade protien shake this morning. I have found myself drinking those more lately than the ones fresh out of the blender. With Korbin being home during the summer, the blender will get much more use because he loves fruit smoothies.It is just as easy to make a protien shake for myself too.

Something else I have found myself doing lately is heading to the fruit market. I love picking up fresh fruit and veggies there to keep the fruit stocked. It appears the prices are better on most things I get that are fresh, and it just makes me feel like I am doing something better for my family. It also take alot of choice out of my random "Oh! This sounds good!" shopping which usually means junk food.

Tonights dinner holds stuffed green peppers. We LOVE them and they are not that bad for you!! I used 1/2 cup brown rice,  1 cup sliced mushrooms,1/2 cup reduced sodium canned diced tomotos,1 entire green pepper and 4ozs of 85/15 hamburger for each pepper. Dinner is 489 calories, 20 g fat, 49 g carbs, 7 g fiber, 30 g of protien and 9 g sugar. Not to bad for something so good and so filling.

It is my goal for June to loose 10 pounds, and I think it is achievable!!

On a side note, I have had several readers email me and ask whats going on?? Some of my posts are vague and sad or depressed sounding. I do not mean to cause anyone any alarm. My family and I are just going through something that I just can not go into great detail about right now. I appreciate your kind thoughts and prayers, and I just ask that you keep them coming! When the time is right, I will fill everyone in and do a little more explaining.

Meanwhile, I will continue to blog about my weightloss journey and continued endevors toward being a Godly wife and mother.

I will leave you with two thoughts: my morning devotions lead me to Jeremiah 30:17 " For I will restore you to health.And I will heal your wounds, says the Lord."
And 1 Peter 5:5b-6 " God resists the pride and gives grace to the humble. Therefore humble yourselves under the hand of God that He may exhault you in due time,casting all your cares upon Him for He cares for you".

~Kristy~


Saturday, May 26, 2012

What If..

Last night was a rough night as a beautiful little two year old boy slept in my bed. It is always so sweet to cuddle next to one of the boys in the middle of the night as thier innocence abounds. Those moments are fleeting as my eye lids get heavy and I also want to sleep. That is when the kicking, rolling over and over and over begins. There is never any sleep for momma sleeping next to one of the boys..even in its sweetness.

I spent most of the night in a fog between being a sleep and awake, dreaming of all the places I would be if I would have made different decisions.

It was harder than normal to wake up this morning to alot of the same ol, some ol. My hurt even to the idea that life would be differant for the boys, if I would have choosen a differant path..

I would be differant if I choose a differant path..

Trying to think that God allowed me to make my own decisons because He  ultimately knew it would bring me back to the same place:Him.

I love God. I have always loved God. As a young child, I spend my youth in church with church friends. It was went I looked outside of that place and those poeple, I lost something. Looking back, it was more than I thought at the time.

It was not until many years later that I realized loving God and knowing Him meant two entirely differant things. That was when I compeletely surrendered my life to Him, and that was when my path, my dreams and the journey I thought I was taking took a drastically differant turn.

The turn has brought so much heart ache that I never would have thought that seeking to know God, really know Him, would have brought me through this circle of heartache that I am still enduring.

I do not regret the decision I made, nor do I regret the decision to continue to follow God anywhere through anything trusting Him. I regret the pain that I can not seem to make the right decision to alevate my family from continuely enduring!!

The decisions I am making, the path I am following must not be the one God is not wanting me to continue on. Throughout the day I have just been questioning, "Where do I go from here?"

If money were not an object, I would pick-up with Rod & the boys,we would go somewhere and start again. This has been our prayer for along time, to move and start our life together. Not the lives that other people think that we should be living and putting there selfish thoughts, opinions and feelings upon us to deal with. As if we do not have enough to consentrate upon other than what others want for us, instead we are searching for what God wants for our family.

"What if.." is the question that has plaqued my existence today and I do not have answers for the questions my soul has. Wished I did, it may make it easier to sleep and walk through tomorrow.

Tomorrow..
I do not know what tomorrow holds..
What if tomorrow..

I do not know what tomorrow holds but I do know the one who holds tomorrow. Tonight may be rough, and the days may continue to be uncertain but if my faith continues to hold strong, I know God will eventually lead me down the path He has designed specifically for me. Even if there days like this..

~Kristy~

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Stress Eatting..again

The last week or so has been going well taking my supplements, increasing my protien, reducing my sugar intake and my carb intake.

I feel a TON better taking care myself physically and nutritionally. Recently my pastor said in random conversation, that the best way he has found to reduce his stress level was to change things up a little with what he eats[and how he exercises]. That was one of the primary reasons that prompted me to finally start moving and get something accomplished instead of talking about it.

Then yesterday occured, and today it all fell apart. There as been several things occuring recently where my husbands intergrity and character has been called into question over a little kids sports league. It is really starting to upset me!! I have blogged about this before, and riduclousness how competive 7/8 year old sports are becoming and how grown men/women choose to act like children and bring down grown men/women who chose to grown men/women.Reguardless of other peoples actions, I will not stand by and allow other people who sit on the sidelines completely disrespect my husband who gives of himself to coach your child while you sit there!! Even if he makes a mistake, he is doing so trying which is a whole lot more than what some people are doing!! Ughh!!

I held it together yesterday, today I started my eatting off my a high sugar/high carb coffee drink. I guess I expected it may make me feel better in some respect however, it did not. I did not log my food, nor did I drink my water nor watch my portion sizes. Instead I grabbed handfuls of this or that whenever I felt the stress bubbling up as I watched my husband fall on his sword and do something that he did not have to do in order to make sure "his" kids understand that real men do not act this way on or off the field. If they make mistake they admit it, apologize for it and take there punishment without complaint.My husband willingly stepped up to take a punishment, that he was not asked to in the name of good sportsmanship. Now THAT says character and intergrity!!

Now, as I type replaying again the seasons actions of both my husband and I, and a vast many others drinking a slurpee. Disgusted with fact that I threw all that I worked so hard for over the last ten days out the window.

Stress/Emotional eatting has always been an issue for me.

Tomorrow is a new day, I will start differantly tomorrow and I will chose not to let the let the actions of others have so much control over me.

As for the rest of the day, instead of wallowing whatever this feeling is, I am chosing to pray for those who are causing us so much distress. It is just another attempt that the Devil is using to bring Rod & I down. Maybe that is the point, that these people need to be prayed for and God is just using this situation to bring it too light.

My husband said it best, " I do not know what other people do when they go home. As for me, I leave it on the field. I harbor no resentment or ill will towards them. Jesus himself said, " The presucted me,so they prescuted you". I have done what I can do".

I hate to see Rod bullied in this manor, but I am thankful for his attitude. I am thankful for him and his willingness to continue to coach even after this.

I love you, Rod, for everything that you are and everything that you are not. "In your weakness, Christ may be glorified!!

~Kristy~

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Comparison is the Thief of Joy

A friend posted this on her FB page, and I have thought alot about it since seeing it.


I often find myself comparing my journey in life against the journey of others. Although I know that I should not compare myself with others, just as two snow flakes are never completely the same, the same holds true for the path that each person must take. Yet, it is easy enough to do and if your are not careful, you will do it several times a day without even realizing it.

 The bible says in John 10:10  that The thief [The devil] comes only to steal and kill and destroy. By comparing ourselves to others we are allowing him to steal our joy. The question I have: is it worth it??

Most people know the story of the 3 little pigs, the story suggests that if you do your work before you play you will get a head. It also says that you should not build with straw nor sticks, but build something that lasts, build with bricks. Jesus that we He is the corner stone upon which we should build our faith. He is our brick, the author of our Joy and our faith and if we look to Him, He will help us to find an inner joy when when our circumstances or comparisons, says that we are not good enough.

If you look back over many of my blog posts, you can see where I can compared my weightloss success, my running endeavors and a vast many other things to that of other people. It saddens me to think that I have never thought of these things through the Father's Eyes. He has prepared my life specifically for me and my constantly comparing myself to the life He has designed for others, I am telling Him what He has planned for me is not good enough. I decided that my Joy comes from something else other than things that have an eternal value.

I seen this yesterday at the baseball field, where a group of young athletes have given up simply because one person has compared their team with that of others, and to this person their journey does not measure up to what  he or she thinks it should be. Instead of realizing that the kids are learning something and having fun and get exercise, this person think that the entire experience is based upon the score at the end and how much time his or her child plays on the field. Teaching our kids to compare themselves to others, both on & off the field, is not only stealing their joy but their self worth. You will never measure up to what you think someone else has.


The thief has only come to steal, kill and destroy By letting him into your heart and mind to compare yourself to others, he is doing his job extremely well by stealing your joy.And while there are many things you can do, and while you can certainly build a house of brick, and live a healthy lifestyle or win baseball games - no matter how hard we try, we cannot save ourselves. As well as the material things that bring us temporary joy and happiness,will not add eternal value to your lives.

I am not advocating in any fashion that getting a pedicure( for an example) has not eternal value and brings only temporary happiness, should no longer be done. I am saying that if those types of things are the only things that fill your life with joy, then there is something missing. Or someone missing. The love of the Savior that has " come to give you life and give it abundantly."

We cannot save ourselves, but Jesus can, Jesus does. We cannot overcome sin, death and the devil by ourselves, but Jesus has. Jesus has overcome by the cross, and the empty tomb, and resurrection from the dead. Jesus has not only overcome, but Jesus has conquered. Jesus saves. Jesus can save us from the world, the flesh, and the devil, and Jesus can even save us from ourselves. Jesus came that he might give us life, not just ordinary life, but abundant life, everlasting life in the new heaven and the new earth where there is no more sin, or sickness, or suffering, or sorrow.

We need a Savior from the one that seeks to kill, steal and destroy our joy. My joy. Your joy. Faith comes by hearing, and hearing comes from the word of God. Have you heard about the man who sticks closer than a brother? Who has laid down His life for you and me? The man who will walk with you in spirit for the rest of your days if you only ask Him too? Whenever you see loss, death, and destruction you know that the enemy is at work. The only way to combat darkness is through the Light, and Jesus Christ is the Light of the world.

And while many people know about the 3 little pigs, the only thing that really matters, the only thing we really need to know, is to know about our Savior, to know about Jesus. People have taught us about Jesus, because Jesus is our Savior and we need a savior from the world, the flesh, and the devil who is all seeking to steal, kill and destroy your life, your soul and your joy.

 The Spirit works through the word to create faith in our hearts. Faith which teaches us to know our Saviors voice. Faith which leads us to follow him, faith which hope in the abundant and everlasting life which we are promised in his name. So Jesus has called us to life. Through life with Jesus you can have an inner joy that passes all understanding, when times beyond hard and you have no where else to turn Jesus can fill your soul with a joy, a hope and a peace that can only come from knowing Him.

~Kristy~




Monday, May 21, 2012

Trip to the park

After, my last post I gathered up Konnor and his big wheel (motorcycle), something cold for each of us to drink and headed out the door.
The first thing I learned is that just because Konnor knows how to ride the motorcyle in the living room does NOT mean he can ride it proficently at the park.
He kept swerving off to one side and then we wanted me to push him. So our first trip around the the large circle was very time consuming and challenging. We did not make it hald way around before I was sweating profusely and my stomach was aching because of bending at the waist to push the big wheel and attempting to walk at the same time.
In order to give myself a break, we stopped to sit under a shade tree and count the duck. That was my favorite part of the trip!!
We counted the ducks over and over, sang the ABC's and Jesus loves me. We cuddled under the tree and enjoyed the breeze and I realized how thankful I am for my boys! Konnor told me that the fountain in the middle of the pond was a "shower" and he talked, talked and talked some more!
Konnor would press the center and yell "Start you enginy"

All to soon, he was ready to ride his motorcycle again and off we went. The second hald of the cycle was much easier than the first as Konnor finally caught on. He stopped several times to talk to the ducks but finally we were back to the beginning and it was none too soon.
We took the big wheel back to the car and walked around the circle one more time. I did more walking and Konnor did more being carried, but it reminded me how hard it is on my body to carry 35 extra pounds around everyday.
Sweating and red, we headed home after a little more than an hour but it was a nice time hour. Something we will definately be doing again but I think I will be putting the push handle back on the bigh wheel to avoid pushing the handle again.
Its nice to have certain things that I have done with Korbin to do again with Konnor, and continue to make making memories!

Monday, Monday..



The Mommas and the Papa's said it best , "Monday Monday, can't trust that day,
Monday Monday, sometimes it just turns out that way.Oh Monday morning, you gave me no warning of what was to be....But whenever Monday comes, but whenever Monday comes,You can find me cryin' all of the time"

Well, I am not exactly crying but I am seriously unmotivated!! Not to sabotage myself and my hard work from last week, I reached for my favorite EAS Carb Control Premade Shake ( Yum! Dark Chocolate). Instead of making my Dr. Oz Egg and Cheese Muffin this morning.

There is a ton of laundry calling my name to be folded and put away. The dishwasher needs to be loaded from the week-end and Chemistry desperately needs my attention. Instead, I am sitting on the couch watching Little Einsteins with Konnor.
The week-ends are so busy! Its almost as if I need a day to recover from the marathon of things we shove into two days but I then I feel guilty for taking the time to do just sit and be still for a moment.

I am really debating the idea of throwing Konnor in the car and going for a walk at my favorite park to clear my head. I have so many thoughts, idea's and feelings rolling around in there that I am doubting that I can accomplish all that I have set out to do!!

The summer after my gastric bypass, Korbin and I could be found at this park 3-4 days a week. We loved it there!! We would take his tricycle and he would fly through the covered bridge gaining speed and then when he would get to the end where the hill would desend, he would lift his feet and sail down the other side. If I listen long enough, I can still hear his giggles!! Without a doubt, my gastric bypass was the best option for my entire family because at almost 400lbs, I never would have been able to do that.

Now, at 250-something, I often feel sluggish but determined NOT to go back there ever!! Sitting at baseball and soccer this week-end I got some amazing sun(burns) and love the golden glow my skin has. It makes me feel good about myself. When I feel good about myself, then I am better to and for the people around me. That's how walking at the park makes me feel, good about myself.

 Well, I think I have talked myself into getting off the couch and heading to the park...who needs folded laundry anyway?!

I did start the l-carnitine supplement this morning with my protein shake. The information I listed said it may energize you or make you feel as your heart is beating a little faster in the beginning until you get use to taking it. I do not feel that side effect, nor did I get the extra energy from it either. It may take a couple of days for it to get into my system, and I am going to make the Dr. Oz muffin for lunch after I get home from the park!! Chat with you all later!!

~Kristy~





Sunday, May 20, 2012

New Supplements

I already take several supplements to support the nutrient loss that I have from my gastric bypass. Although I eat more now than I did in the beginning, I also drink with my meals which causes the food to be pushed through my pouch alot quicker thus not absorbing what my body needs nutritionally from my food.

Currently I take:
  1. 2 multivitamins
  2. 1200mg Calcium
  3. D-1000 iu
  4. Super B Complex with Folic Acid plus Vitamin C
  5. 500mg High Potency Vitamin C
  6. 1000mcg Biotin
  7. Sub lingual B-12(1 dropperful is 1ml)
 Last week I added 1000mg of Conjugated linoleic acids (CLA).


 CLA Benefits:
  • Cancer: Animal studies show that as little as 0.5 percent CLA in your diet could reduce tumors by over 50 percent, including the following types of cancer:
    • Breast
    • Colorectal
    • Lung
    • Skin
    • Stomach
  • Cardiovascular disease
  • High blood pressure
  • High Cholesterol and triglycerides
  • Osteoporosis
  • Insulin resistance: CLA’s actions actually mimic the effect of synthetic diabetic drugs. Testing on mice with type 2 diabetes have shown CLA to improve insulin action and reduce circulating glucose. Even better, the early results from human trials are just as positive, when consuming CLA for longer than eight weeks.
  • Inflammation
  • Immune system invaders
  • Food-induced allergic reactions
  • Body Composition: Exciting research with humans has shown that CLA has been beneficial in lowering body fat, with even greater improvement in those who combine exercise with dietary intake of CLA. Animal research has been even more promising, with significant improvements seen in both reducing body fat and in increasing lean body mass.
  • Previous studies have shown that CLA reduces body fat while preserving muscle tissue, and may also increase your metabolic rate. A study published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition found that people who took 3.2 grams of CLA a day had a drop in fat mass of about 0.2 pounds a week (that’s about one pound a month) compared to those given a placebo.
Since CLA cannot be manufactured in the human body, you must get it from your diet or a supplement. And your best dietary source of CLA is grass-fed beef. The information for further health benefits of grass feed beef you can go to The secret sauce in grass- fed beef.
This week, I am adding a supplement that I use to take  immediately after my surgery to help boost my energy levels. It was suggested by my nutritionist, and I followed her suggestion in blind faith. Over the years, I stopped taking it and now I wished that I had not.

This week I will be adding 500 mg of L-Carnitive twice per day at breakfast and lunch.

L-Carnitine  is an amino acid found in red meat. L-Carnitine acts as a shuttle, pulling fat into the cell so it can be burned as fuel. L-Carnitine will also give you energy and ease depression. If you feel better, you won’t want to overeat, and you might even get to the gym! Aim for 500 mg twice a day at breakfast and again at lunch. Don’t take this near bedtime because it could keep you awake. This is a safe supplement and won’t give you the jitters.
  • L-Carntine helps Enhance Endurance; According to Vanderbilt University, some athletes seem to respond to the use of L-carnitine by gaining endurance.L-carnitine is also promoted as a supplement that enhances fat metabolism, which results in fat being burned as an energy source.

  • L-Carnitine can also boost brain function;Deficiencies of L-carnitine can lead to premature aging of the brain, dementia, impaired cognition and other age-related disorders. According to Natural News, L-carnitine might also work to protect your brain against the deterioration and slow down that comes naturally as you age.

  • Lastly, L-Carnitine may also protect the heart;According to certified clinical nutritionist Byron Richards, L-carnitine can help prevent or reduce the damage caused by free radicals in the body. This, in turn, keeps your arteries young, protecting your heart and lowering your chances of developing high blood pressure and hardening of the arteries. If you would like to read more about L-Carnitine, head to Live Strong.com
Next Week, I will be adding White Kidney Bean Extract.
This ingredient is a known carb blocker and works great for those “off” eating days. Taken along with a high-carb, high-fat meal, white kidney bean extract will block those unwanted calories from being stored as fat. It will also keep your blood sugar balanced. Aim for 300-500 mg two times a day with meals.

I have talked before about how much I insulin I was taking to combat my Type 2 Diabetes's, so not only do L-Carnitine & White Kidney Bean Extract help boost my metabolism but they are not the prime reason I am taking them.

I promised myself I would never again put myself in the position to take that much insulin or poke myself that many time a day again! So, as I research these supplements the main focus was their blood sugar stabling abilities. Since my blood sugar has been flucuating recently, I am attracted to any safe method for reducing/stablizing my bloodsugar without looking my endocrinologist in the face with a look of disappointment for not control my diabete's better which has essentially been in remission, if you will, since I lost my first 100lbs.

Taking control of my regain is now more necessary than just the number on the scale or the size on my jeans.

Taking supplements has been a way of life for me since 2008 when I choose to have my gastric bypass.It is called a "malabsorbtive" procedure and I knew I would be taking vitamins, in one form or another, for the rest of my life. I have heard horror stories from others who have gotten comfortable and stopped taking thier vitamins, and those stories have scared me enough to keep taking mine, getting my labs done and adding/subtracting supplements as necessary.

I am looking forward to a new week and its new possibilities!! Philippians 4:13  "I can do all things through Christ who Strengthens me"

~Kristy~

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Saturday Night under the Lights

It is Saturday night and I am sitting here alone nursing my sunburn watching a "girly" show with my feet propped up as the scent of peppermint foot scrub fills the air.

I am relaxed and content after an extremely busy day.

At the beginning of baseball season, the little league committee decided that they were going to have one set of teams each Saturday night to play under the lights to let the kids feel what the major league players would experience. Rod and Korbin head out the door each Saturday to the baseball field, which we have typically just left a very short time before. I love the fact that they are bonding over something that Rod enjoys so much, baseball.

I also love the time I just to spend alone.

This week has been extremely taxing on Rod and I as we have encounter several health issues, as well as seen people we love at our church family as well as other friends experience a tragedy that has brought extreme perspective to how fleeting life is.

I have taken the time this week to love on my boys, play with them and enjoy them in ways that I have been too busy to do in recent day. I find myself really sad at the fact that I have let days slip through my fingers while the boys are young all because my life is buys with things.

Also, I have spend more time focused on how amazing my husband is rather than how beat down we have both been my circumstance and people. I have prayed more for him and asked God to breathe new life into my view of Rod and help  me to sincerely be his "helpmate" rather than all of the things that have gotten in the way of that over the years.

As a result, I have been looking for ways to simplify my life and allowing me to focus on God and the family that God has given me. Simplifying my life means saying no to alot of things that my heart really wants to say yes too. I am a helper my nature and enjoy helping others. None of that is necessarily a bad thing, but in recent days I feel God calling me to slow down. When I did not listen, He purposely put things in my path to make me slow down.

Monday instead of going to baseball, Konnor cried from 2pm until 4:30, when I had to make the tough call to keep him home rather than go to watch Korbin play. Wednesday, I went late to the game because Korbin has injured his ankle and was not playing. Konnor and I went 45 minutes before the end of the game to pass out the cupcake for a players birthday that day. I stayed home from baseball practice on one day and ran, kicked and enjoyed soccer practice rather than viewing it from this sidelines on another.

The days were filled with doctors appointments and phone calls that forced Rod and I to realize that our health in not to be taken lightly, so on Tuesday I began my Dr. Oz eating plan. Previously when I began a knew eating plan, it was stressful . This was not the case this time, it reduced my stress level and changed things up enough to actually help  me to endure the uncertainty to what was going on.

Sitting here tonight, I am reflective about the weeks events and so thankful for God's provision and blessing. Listening to the tv in the background as I type away on the computer, I look forward to the next week with its challenges and blessings knowing what even occurs that I can handle it because God does not called the equipped but He equips the called. What ever Gods calling is for me and my family in this life, I know that He will equip us for the journey and I know He will never leave us or forsake us along the way.

May your week be filled will blessings as you enjoy the things that last week you let slip through your fingers, never taking for granted those you love and that love you in return!

~Kristy~

Friday, May 18, 2012

Courage

The scale read this morning 256.2 lbs, which is down from the 259.7 that it was reading ( exactly 3.5lbs down!). I was pretty excited with that because I only began my Dr. Oz eating plan on Tuesday this week. It was nice for the scale to reflect what I was feeling: doing better.
I just simply feel better when I eat better. I did not really "give up" anything, I had coffee all week, and a candy bar and a couple of cup cakes that I baked for Rod's soccer team. Yet, I felt more in control because I did not scarf down 4 cup cakes at once but instead consumed 4 cupcakes over the course of 4 day, and they were still delicious just spread out.
The fact that I was feeling better gave me the courage to work out with the soccer team yesterday. I had forgotten how much I loved soccer until I felt the ball connect with my foot and the feeling of running down the field and being in control of the ball as I kick hard and it connects with the net. It was also fun to hear Korbin say, "That was cool mom! How do you put a spin on the ball like that?" It was nice not to be winded and not to be concerned about how I look running, just doing it and living in the moment.
As a child, I was told I was not an athlete.So, I never really tried. I played alot of soccer with my friends for fun, but at that time there were not soccer teams to join( that I knew of anyway). So, I joined the band and student council, doing my thing there. I watched my sister join every sports she desired and achieving reasonable success because she was the "athlete" of the family. I often wonder why this was, but as an adult it has motivated me now to be an athlete, to run the 5K  and to participate with my children in their sports never telling them what they are going to do or not do for sports or music; other than to keep their commitments and to support their endeavors.
I often find myself, at 34, battling the mentality that I am not an athletic person verses being an athletic person is something anyone can work at to become if they want it bad enough. I remember spending alot of time in doors reading, or writing because I felt it was something I could accomplish and do well at as a child instead of going outside and playing. In felt inferior, like to could not even "play" well enough, so why even bother?! 
In gym class, when we played soccer I enjoyed the thrill of the hunt chasing the ball and watching it connect with my foot as I maintained speed controlling it until I could get into position to whack the ball and with a whoosh watch it fly pass the goalie into the net. This, as one of many, is the reason I love to watch Korbin play soccer. I enjoy  connecting with my son in a sport that we both share a passion for. Sadly, I still feel inferior to the idea that " I am not a sports person" and do not share it with him as often as I should. Yesterday for whatever reason, I did not let that stop me and I enjoyed the moment.
Since Konnor is little, the moment was short, as I had to bring him home when soccer practice started. But I was thankful for what time I had, and pray that those opportunities will present themselves more often.
When I feel in control of my food, I often feel more in control of other area's of my life. That is one of the reasons that the year after my gastric bypass I changed and grew so much as a person. I did not like the person that "fat" Kristy was. I hid behind the weight and ate my way through alot of the struggles and emotional issues that I carried from my childhood. Since my transformation was interrupted by my beautiful little miracle, Konnor, because I became pregnant just one year after my bypass I have taken a couple of steps backward.
With the amazing friends and people I have in my life to support me, I feel now, like I felt in 2008. Confident enough to take the step forward, instead of starting my journey and will now attempt to complete it.
Yes, I would like to meet my goal weight but more than that, I want to feel good about who I am and what I have accomplished; both on and off the scale.
I have finally come to the conclusion that I am more than the number on the scale, and my entire self worth should not rest of what the scale does or does not say. This is a battle for me, like many other, but I try to keep it in the for front off my mind, But it is nice when the number does reflect my hard work!

~Kristy~

Thursday, May 17, 2012

What's New

Its been awhile since I have blogged (or blogged in general) about running, since it has been awhile since I have ran. I feel like the dream of being a "runner" is passing me by.

With Korbin being in soccer AND baseball, in addition to me being in school, just to name a few reason that I have not gotten back on the treadmill.

After hurting my ribs, I have been super apprehensive about hurting myself again.

I have began the Dr. Oz diet plan for the stomach, I blogged about before. I begin this week eating the poached egg, tomato, Swiss cheese, avocado on whole wheat english muffin. It is extremely filling and I typically only get through half. I also added the supplement Dr Oz recommended; CLA 1000mg. I found it at walmart where the serving size is 2 pills for 2000mg however, I am spilting the Dr. Oz recommendation for only 1000mg. Today, I changed up the  Muffin and scrambled the egg w/ a splash of milk and omitted the avocado, since I really do not care for it. Tomorrow, I think I will return to the poached egg but still leave off the avocado, unless I mash it and dice the tomato and spread it on the english muffin.

So this is what my food has looked like this week:

BreakFast

·       Egg and Cheese Muffin( Calories 413/28 g fat/26g carbs/5g fiber/14g protein/3g sugar)

1 toasted whole grain English muffin

2 tsp olive oil

1/4 ripe avocado

1 slice tomato

1 egg, poached

1 slice Swiss cheese

Freshly ground pepper to taste

Directions

Drizzle the English muffin with a little olive oil, then spread 1/4 ripe avocado on it. Top it off with the slice of tomato, Swiss cheese, poached egg and the pepper to taste. Enjoy!



Lunch

         ·         Premade Protein Shake(110 calories/3g fat/4g carbs/2 g fiber/17g    protein/0  sugar)

·         McD’s Sugar-Free Lg Vanilla Ice Coffee (120 calories/11g fat/16g carbs/0 fiber/2 g protein/2 g sugar)



Snacks

·         4 Sugar Free popsicles(40 calories/0 fat/18 g carbs/4 g fiber/ 0 protein/0 sugar)

·         Pretzels-17-(11o calories/0.5 g fat/23g carbs/1g fiber/3g protein/0 sugar) & 1 oz block cheddar cheese ( 120 calories/ 10g fat/ 0 carbs/0 fiber/6g protein/0 sugar)

·         Sugar Free Pudding (60 calories/ 1 g fat/12g carbs/2g protein/0 sugar)



Drinks( In addition to listed above)

·         32 oz of Sugar Free Ice Tea

·         32 oz of Water

  •  1 Cup Coffee



973 calories/53 fat grams/96 carbs/ 12g fiber/45 g protein/ 6g sugar



Dinner

Under 600/ 22 fat grams
-Low carb, High protien & something with tomato= goal



Daily goal is:
1700 calories
75 grams fat < less
150 gram carbs
75 gram protien >more
15 gram sugar

I put on my "fat" jeans yesterday and I noticed that the waste was definately looser. I wish I would have taken my friend Jen's advice and measured my waste ahead of time.

Next week, I am going to start doing the thigh/leg protien shake. I like the way I feel doing this and I finally feel like I have some control over my food again. I know what I am eatting, and when I should be eatting. There is alot of confusion taken out of the equation of being hungry and not knowing what to eat and not feeling guilty about eatting something bad.

I intitally lost 2 pounds but have not lot any more sense that.

I am wondering if I can change the cheese or if it has to be swiss and if I could add something in place of the avocado. I may email the Dr. Oz show and see if I get a response to this question. Well, I need to get moving soccer practice is in an 1/2 hour and this momma needs to find some shin guards.

~Kristy~

My Husband, the Coach

Ok, pardon me if I step on my soap box to vent a moment:

Rod took on two sports this season to coach.

Three soccer seasons ago, Rod stepped into a pair of cleats to fill a roll as a volunteer coach because there was a need. Knowing he had never lead a team as a Head Coach before he spent countless hours searching, planning, anticipating, praying and investing into a group of children he has never met before. Each day, he got up early or went to bed late in addition to the demands our own family placed on him getting ready to lead a new group of tomorrows leaders today, as elementary school soccer players. With each win, he searched longer and harder, how to continue to teach and motivation "his" team and with each loss he mourned each goal scored and vowed to learn how to come back and teach "his" team how to loose graciously, learn from their defeat and how to regain control over their own destiny. For something that is strictly volunteer,Rod spent countless hours pouring and investing into the hearts and lives of kids.

Rod was born to be a coach.

This season, when the phone rang again, there was a need and Rod once again agreed to fulfill a role in a new sport although openly  admitting he had never head coached in this particular area. Ready for the challenge, Rod and I, rearranged our entire family schedule to welcome another group of children into our sports family for the season. I could outline the fancy foot work that one man must do to coach two different sports simultaneously however, if you have ever had to run two different children to two different sports as the same time you may have an understanding. Although being the coach, it is kinda like that scenario on steroids.

I have went to bed many nights only to wake up finding the Internet open to coaching philosophies, practice drills and the rule book laying on his chest as he has fallen asleep again investing in, praying for and  teaching other peoples children when they themselves have gone to sleep or have long forgotten about "Coach".

I love to see the kids run in from the fields, to high five my man as the sweat drips from their forehead and they lean in together for a "power talk". He knows their names, their favorite position, he looks for their weaknesses and strives to do what ever he can to make them better. On the field and off.

Through the seasons, I have sat along side amazing, dedicated parents who love their kids enough to teach them to respect their coach, in wins and losses, and understand what he does is volunteer and if they should have a problem with his coaching style respect themselves enough to ask him why.

I have seen Rod spend countless hours with parents,in addition to their children, explaining, motivating and empowering these people who came to him with a concern to be better parents and to take coaching personally as something they can to do bond with their children and create amazing memories. He does not have to do this, he does this because he loves the kids he coaches.

My husband is an AMAZING coach win, loose, or draw! The way he cares for kids he does not know other than a list he is handed at the beginning of a season, how he  motivates them and teaches them about the game  as well as life. I would put his character, integrity, passion up again any paid coach that there ever was or will be to come.

Rod has no idea he is the topic of my blog post, if anything he may be a little embarrassed to know that I have written about him in this manor. He does not do what he does for praise or acknowledgement, he does it because he has had amazing coaches along the way and he want to coach another generation of children to love themselves enough to love a sport and be great at it.Yet, he recognizes he is not perfect and just as he expects you to bring your child to practice to learn the art of the game, he expects much more of that from himself. Trust me, any coaches wife will tell you.

Greatness is not given out to athletic children who want to be a great baseball player or soccer star simply because they want it. It is worked at and strives for and must be met with a certain amount of dedication that a parent must step in and help his or her child to recognize when they would rather give up or give in. With this being said, what makes any parent, myself included, think that a great coach just appears one day when you bring your child to practice?

Further more, why does any parent think that he or she can sit in the stands or on the sidelines making a fuss over a volunteer position when they themselves have chosen not to step up or step in to help? I have had issues with coaches before, and I have had to ask myself if I thought I was truly helping Korb or hurting him by talking poorly about his coach ( especially in front of him), not going to the coach with my specific concerns or  not empowering Korbin to talk to his coach or stick up for himself? In addition to all of that, I did not want to look like a horses behind talking "trash" about someone who had given of themselves freely to coach my child and his team.

I am not defending my husband the coach, I am defending ALL volunteer coaches. Rod was born to be a coach, case closed. But some are not. But, does that give me the right to talk poorly about him or her, make fun of them, or just make life for the team as well as the coach generally miserable?? NOPE! Sorry! Kobin is watching and if he is not to disrespect authority, why would I do that on his behalf?? Make no mistake, I will not let anyone mistreat my son but is having him take his knocks and earn his position on the field on honestly being mistreated? Again, the answer is no.

I thought long & hard about writing this, because as much as I may or may not have a specific person in mind when I type this, I am more speaking about who my husband is and seeing volunteer coaching from my perspective. Which is this, simply stated:Grow up people!! I paid my money right along with you, but I have NEVER EVER complained about my child taking the bench or being taken outta the game. I just tell him to work hard, life is not fair and you have to strive to go after what you want. I am always on his side and in his corner, my child knows I am always his biggest fan BUT I will not cripple him by allowing him to whine, complain and think he can get whatever he wants without working for it!!! If you have a problem with the coach, ask him or her!!! Do what you expect your kids to do, have respect. Clap for each player, do not allow your kids to make fun of others and ENJOY it!! You will never pass this way again and wouldn't you rather leave the field at the end of the year knowing that you and your child handled everything in a manor you can be proud of because make so mistake, if you are acting like a horses behind that is what everyone will begin to think of you and it will come back to haunt you (or your kid) in the future.

I am stepping off of my soap box now...

~Kristy~